Acting?

I was cast in a production of the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe recently – my first show! When I was 13 I decided that I was going to be an actress; not a famous movie actress who went to red-carpet events, but the one who captivated audiences while on stage.

I gave up on that dream when I was 14. I had recently joined a drama school and despite loving every minute I suddenly realised that there was no way that I could ever compete with the talent, skills and beauty of these aspiring actors – I was just plain Eve. I chose a “sensible” career path from then on – ICT. Don’t get me wrong, I’m good at ICT but the soul just isn’t there.

Despite that I’ll always take solace in the art of acting as I can just leave all my problems behind and put my heart into playing a character. It’s tough at times, no doubt about it, but I’m extremely lucky to have the opportunity to act

This was the fourth show that I’ve auditioned for. Two rejections and another that I couldn’t take part in due to high fees (£350 to take part in a show?!) later I’m actually in a show. It just doesn’t seem real yet.


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Autopilot

Many of you know that I moved from a local grammar school to a college in the city centre and I just wanted to tell you all about a weird thing that happened to me a few weeks ago.

I woke up one morning feeling a bit groggy despite waking naturally, and my brain just went into autopilot. I sat at the edge of my bed and tested my blood as usual, and then went to get my school uniform as usual… But that’s not usual anymore, I don’t have a uniform anymore. 

I didn’t fully realise my mistake until I was holding the sharpie signature covered shirt that was once one of the four blue shirts I owned that it was not my uniform anymore because I left school. It was just so weird, I took it out of the wardrobe and held it and had a cry. I’m not sad that I left since I know it was the right choice for me but sometimes I miss the people and the regular timetable and the crappy school dinners and even the uniform. Obviously, as a friend pointed out when I told her about this, that school played a major role in my life for five years – it completely consumed it at times – it’s completely natural that I still haven’t found a new “normal”. 

After having a wee cry I checked my phone – it was 4am on a Saturday morning. My mind works in mysterious ways.

Not Very Committed 

I’ve taken part in NaBloPoMo in recent years but this year I just didn’t fancy it, which raised the question “should I be putting more into this blog?” The answer to that is yes, but I can’t do that until I know what direction I’m going in with this one. I originally intended for it to be food related because who doesn’t like food? But I don’t have the patience to write recipes and take pretty pictures, it all just feels a bit soulless. So I think the best option for me is to blog about my day to day life – maybe weekly – but let’s see what happens, and hopefully you’ll here more from me soon.

LilyEve